It is kind of ironical how two temperaments, though not completely yet somewhat conflicting, can survive so neatly within a person, defining every bit of her. One such entertaining couple that loyally resides within me is my love for writing and a corresponding yet contrasting fear of the routine. While I could write during the oddest hours with utmost pleasure, day after day, in the very next instant I would perhaps be hyperventilating with utter nervousness if I had to attach that joy with an element of uncompromising regularity and an assured certainty. My blog therefore, as I would imagine, would be an entertaining effort to battle that inertia of impulse within me and bind the two conflicting qualities in holy matrimony like any married couple who survives a fruitful companionship through acceptance, need, and of course adjustment. This fragment of space, in a strange sort of way, stands as the single testimony of my primary intent of accomplishing the above. Though the simple reason still remains to be my absolute love for writing.
Here I must confess though, in all honesty, that there used to be a much dumber me who would snap-judge the nature of writings that most blogs carried by their apparent lack of credibility, the element of anonymity of its writer, the frivolity with which words were used and abused, the several unaccounted opinions and facts that were poured out in the name of spontaneity, and the sheer lack of editing, not to mention the risk of plagiarism. But over the years my obsession with facts and grammatical coherence has eased out considerably, hopefully for the better of me. These days, opinions and experiences seem to draw more of my attention than facts and grammatical accuracy in a single language that invariably gets more than its fair share of attention across the globe, though neither of them – opinions or facts and grammar – belittles the other’s presence. The element of obscurity and rawness in people’s perspectives (even of those who wish to remain incognito) reveals so much more of what lies around me. Nothing inspires me more than an independent opinion and a questing mindset; It could be a poet who searches for a meaning behind her existence, or a man who questions the social norms and judiciary system, or it could be a bartender who discovers how a twist of lemon could add the right zing to the spirit!
I remember how, as a child, I was often teased and reprimanded too by teachers and relatives for asking too many questions; some of those questions still continue to haunt me and leave me boggled. Since not all those questions can translate into a meaningful book, poem or a short story, I figured that a blog might just be the most powerful platform for me to communicate them through. If not for anything else, it is always a more romantic proposition to have one’s self-attested significant opinions (like mine perhaps) tossed into eternity within the cyber black hole than having them spiked into a trashcan by an ordinary mortal in the most unimaginative way. Cyberspace that best lends me a sense of eternity seems like the most apt platform for me to voice my opinions and ideas that come to me from another space unknown and equally limitless within me. Since most of what I infer and experience are fuelled by travelling to unknown lands and terrains, interacting with their local people and getting to know the myriad cultures, noticing nature… and of course by books, my writings reflect these elements that have so liberally contributed towards making me. The journey though continues…
Finally, regarding the more organised scheme of affairs in my life, I’d like to make a brief mention of the publication of my book Goddess & Whore that is soon to reach the stores – online and otherwise – within and outside India. I promise to share some more information on what that title contains. There are subsequent titles too that I am working on that should see the light of day in due course of time. And that too would be showcased on The Write Click. As I sign off feeling slightly weighed down by a persistent sense of commitment to blog on a “regular” basis (as is the nature of this platform), my earnest prayer to the Cyber Gods faithfully remain – “may the steam last”… even as my fingers hover around the Ctrl Z keys.
© Madhurima Duttagupta 2013